Enneagram Series: Type Four
We’re Back!!! For those of you - which includes my enneagram type - who are not Type One, Two or Three, the wait is over! We are back with weekly blogs picking up with enneagram Type Four....As a quick review, the enneagram is a system that shows us the nine ways that the people in the world default to in life. It explains the “why” of all that we do, think, and feel. There are nine types based on our core motivations and fear so that we can grow as an individual in order to thrive in our life.The enneagram answers the questions: WHO are you? WHY are you? and HOW and WHAT do you want to change? Each week we will examine one of the types so if you missed any of the weeks, you can get caught up by clicking the link in my bio to read the whole blog series.
The Pros and Cons of Being Enneagram Type Four
Type four personalities are the individualists of the world. They typically appear as the sensitive, withdrawn type. Many people may refer to them as the “lone wolf”. Four's fear that they will blend with the crowd, losing any sense of identity or individuality. Because of this fear, they will strive to be uniquely themselves, expressing their individuality through their creativity.Four’s love to envision themselves as unique individuals. They feel as though nobody could possibly understand them because they are too different from other people. Fours pride themselves on their own self-awareness, which allows them to maintain their individuality through awareness of their unique strengths and weaknesses.
The Pros
Creative
Fours pride themselves on being uniquely talented. This belief leads fours to develop and nurture their creative talents to the best of their ability. The four’s self-awareness and sensitivity allow them to harness their deeply creative sides. When type fours are at their best, they are able to create beauty and value in just about anything.
Enhanced Sense of Identity
Fours value their identity over just about everything else. They work to be as true to themselves as possible, embracing everything from their strengths to their weaknesses. Fours aim to do the things that truly bring them happiness and joy. When fours are at their best, they are confident of who they are and have no desire to change themselves to fit in.
Empathetic
Type fours can be deeply sensitive and intuitive to the feelings of both themselves and others. They work to be aware of both their own feelings and motives as well as the feelings and motives of the people around them. This quality can bring great value to their friendships and social lives.
Idealistic
Fours try on multiple identities throughout their lifetimes before settling into the one that feels like the perfect fit. These identities can include some idealistic feats. Within their imaginations, fours can create a version of themselves who is capable of anything. This gives fours the confidence to pursue the things that make them feel good, allowing them to feel as though they are being true to themselves.
Romantic
Fours dream of meeting that one person who can finally understand them for the unique individual they are. Fours can often fall into the category of a ‘hopeless romantic’. While they are under the impression that they are significantly different from the rest of the world, fours do not want to live their lives all alone. Fours dream of showing off their most inner and secret selves to somebody who truly sees them for who they are.
Self-Aware
Fours are very honest with themselves. They work to be self-aware of their own shortcomings, feelings, motives, strengths, and differences. A four is able to accept themselves fully, whether that includes their flaws, successes, failures, or strengths. They do not feel the need to hide any part of themselves because every single piece of them combines to create the unique person they are. The four dream of revealing their full and true identity, which is why they do not waste time trying to cover up any piece of them- no matter how personal that piece is. This self-awareness allows fours to work through tough situations and painful emotions because they are able to process them quicker than those who bottle everything up.
The Cons
Envy
While the self-awareness a four possesses can certainly have its benefits, it also comes with a few downfalls. Fours often find themselves feeling envious when they notice somebody possesses a unique characteristic that the four wishes they possess. Fours often feel as though they are missing a significant piece to creating their unique identity, leading to them feeling jealous when they see that piece in another person.
Moodiness
Fours can become moody as they fall deeper within themselves. Their attempts at self-awareness can become obsessive, taking over their entire lives. When a four is not happy with their identity, they may begin to feel down and empty. When a four is struggling emotionally, they may begin to push others away, believing that there is no way anybody could understand what it is they are going through.
Self-Absorption
Fours believe that there is nobody as unique and different as themselves. Because of this, they believe that nobody could possibly understand where they are coming from. This thought process can lead fours to become self-absorbed. As they pride themselves on self-awareness and individuality, fours can easily begin to become full of themselves. This self-absorption can quickly begin to negatively impact the four’s relationships.
Self-Conscious
The four’s self-awareness can easily tip into the realm of self-consciousness. Fours dream of developing their own unique and beautiful identity. Because of this, they can begin to overthink every little action, word, or thought that doesn’t fit the identity they have created. This overthinking can adversely affect the four's confidence, leaving them feeling awkward in social situations, rethinking their entire identity, and feeling inadequate.
Tips for Growth as a Type Four
Affirmations
Practice positive affirmations. As an enneagram type four, you may find yourself being harsh and overly critical of yourself. Practicing affirmations can help you realize that you are worthy and lovable, no matter what identity you fall under. Try affirmations like:- “I am worthy.”- “I am authentic.”- “I am true to myself.”- “I create beauty wherever I go.”
Embrace Your Creativity
Fours experience great joy when pursuing the art form they love most. When you are feeling overwhelmed or in need of an outlet for your thoughts and emotions, release them into your art.
Focus on Your Unique Talents
Focus on your own passions and strengths. When we fall into the comparison game, it can be easy to become envious and forget that you are uniquely and beautifully you. If you need to, step out of situations that encourage your jealous side. You might want to take a break from social media, shut off the television, and work on your own talents.At their best, fours can be wonderfully creative, beautifully themselves, and amazingly intuitive. Self-care is essential to being the best you that you can be. Want to learn more? Working with me as a coach or as a therapist starts with finding out your Enneagram type and more information than you could ever want! You can learn more about coaching services on my NEW sister site:
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I provide online therapy in Ohio, Tennessee, Florida, California, Texas, and Pennsylvania. In addition, I am able to offer coaching services in all states, as well as internationally. I specialize in treating imposter syndrome, burnout, and anxiety using The Daring Way™ and offer online workshops to clients who want to overcome shame. Contact me today – for either avenue (virtual coaching or online therapy) and let’s be rockstars together!If you want to know more about me you can read about me as a therapist. Or, if you’re curious about my therapy practice then check out my FAQs, or read my mental health blog. To learn more about coaching services check out more info at TABU SORO Coaching.Until then, take care of you and know that we are in this together –
